The Skinny On Pizza

“Anchovies in Vinegar”

He’s over there and I’m over here. We’re surfing like Gidget and Moondoggie and I look up and say, “I don’t feel like cooking.” He says, “What do you want to eat?” I say “What can we get delivered?” He says, “Pizza.” I say, “It’s a shame we can’t get a healthy pizza around here.”

But we live in the 21st century and we surf around on these magic carpets so the mysteries of the universe can be revealed to us. Modern life! Ain’t it great?

With a smirk, I Google “healthy Domino’s pizza”  and this is what I came up with. I don’t know how healthy it will actually be, but at least it’s not too far off the beaten path as far as calories go. Cholesterol… I dunno, but I ordered (online) a 12 inch pizza with the thin crunchy crust, anchovies, spinach, jalapeno peppers and LIGHT cheese. Apparently the 12 inch pie is key in keeping the calories (and all offensive ingredients) down to a roar. It’s all in the portion size – a long time rationalization of mine when I want to eat something that I know I shouldn’t.

The crunchy thin crust is important too. It’s only 80 calories versus the classic hand tossed or ultimate deep dish crusts which weigh in at 160 big, old, fat, carb-y calories. So there’s the skinny on pizza, guys.

Now all we have to do is just sit here and surf away until the doorbell rings. How easy is modern life!

And how stupid is spell check? It doesn’t recognize Gidget and Moondoggie (a.k.a. Jeff). I tried to cut my bangs like Sally Field when I was in high school – not one of my cutest moments in life.


I wrote all of that last night. We waited and waited. About 8:30 we called to find out where our pizza was. They said they never received the order. I went downstairs and threw some pasta in a pan of boiling water. We ate around 9 o’clock. How foolish is it to act all smug and cocky to the universe? Have I not learned about reciprocity? I dreamed of little anchovies swimming up my nose.


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